First Post

So this is my blog. I am not entirely sure what it is going to look like, physically or contextually. But I have a good feeling that it will be fun. I’m assuming that it will be a mixture of my day-to-day events, people that I love, political and scientific rants, spiritual insight, and of course, my well known made-up words and self-proclaimed self-created jokes. I know, you’re ready to offer me money for this. No worry though kids, this is all free; I guess with the exception of a few minutes and a couple brain cells. Those aren’t important right? (did I mention that I’m a Chem major going into medicine?) See already I’ve gone too far. One thing that I do ask of all of you who read this, is that you keep me honest. If you know something isn’t true, point it out. I also have a tendency with blogs to hint at things that should be kept to myself (thus why I haven’t had a blog in a while). So, if you read something, and its not clear, either ask me to clarify, or tell me to shut up about it. Thank you. Also, if you get offended by something I write, let me know. I am not looking to do so, but I do have my views for a reason, so ask, and lets discuss it.

So today, was today. I have a physical chemistry test, mostly over group theory and the mathematical nodes (or nodulation, as I like to say) of the Hydrogen atom. After that I pretty much zoned out til right now. Tonight is Bible study in Allison, which has been an interesting part of my life. Its pretty much only 5 guys, so kind of small. I live with 2 of them, and the two others are brothers, senior and freshman. It’s been good, not what I pictured for sure. Another thing is how God has given me the words to lead it. I’m a planner, so usually I plan everything out, but this semester with 15 hours a week of labs on top of lectures, I haven’t had a ton of time to prepare. But nonetheless, God has brought our group into some awesome conversations and revelations in the book of Acts.

Other than that, all I have to say is that I’m going to make some cream cheese and chives mashed potatoes.

I’m Back!

So…I haven’t blogged in a long time. To be completely honest I almost forgot my password for wordpress. But since I am one of those people who reuses a variety of passwords for everything, I got back into my account. I’m hoping to be writing more, especially as I finish up my time here in Blacksburg and head home to Fort Collins.

For those of you who don’t know, I’m getting married over the summer to a wonderful woman of the Lord, Wesley. It’s about 3 months til the wedding, and for the most part we have been on track getting things done. We have had our certain ups and downs through the process, including losing our wedding venue about a month back that sent us into a bit of a panic. Never-the-less, we are planning a kick-butt party, especially considering the small price tag.

Other than that, not a whole lot going on, except for the fact that in two weeks I travel to Honduras for a medical mission trip with my school, VCOM. Last night I took my first of four doses for typhoid vaccination, felt a bit out of it this morning. The trip should be pretty awesome, and I’ve learned some interesting facts about Honduras in preparation for the trip. For instance, About 1% of Hondurans are HIV-positive. Also, Honduras is the 2nd poorest country in the Western Hemisphere (I’m guessing they are behind Haiti).Expect me to add more later, maybe even in Spanish if I can get it down.

I have a physiology exam Monday, not really looking forward to that. Guess I should get on that.

I am Worried

I know that I’m not meant to be, but I am. Lately it is hard not to be consumed with the task that lays ahead of me.

6 months from now I could be taking an oath that will change the rest of my life. It is not a oath many take, but those who take it, take it seriously.

Who wouldn’t be worried about medical school, right? It’s kind of a big deal. It’s signing onto at least 7 more years of basically no salary. It’s dedicating to 48-hour shifts that will shake your relationships, your body, and your mind. It’s saying, “I care”, when no one truly seems to.

What a blessing. I know that there ARE benefits to being a physician. The salary isn’t bad, the position in society, the ability to heal someone. To not only see a miracle, but to BE a miracle.

It means a life-change. It means moving, potential house-buying, new driver license, cell phone, supermarket, and church group. It means nights spent half-awake in the library or on clinical shift instead of wide-eyed with friends at Dennys.

I have a lot to learn in this short amount of time. A lot of growing up to do. A lot of decisions to make. Will it be worth it? I think so. Actually I can’t think of why it wouldn’t be.

“On hearing this, Jesus said,”It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick. But go and learn what this means, ‘I desire mercy, not sacrifice.’ For I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners.” -Jesus, Matthew 9:12-13

Is that what you call a break?

Back in the swing of things.  This winter break was interesting. Usually this is the point where I would say time went too fast, but in reality it didn’t.  It was just right.

I saw a lot of different things during my break. I saw my friends Russel and Elise unite themselves in marriage. I witnessed my very good friend Matthew propose to his girlfriend Kate within the first seconds of the new year. I saw how drastically Hurricane Ike destroyed the island of Galveston, TX. I said good-bye to my Great-Grandmother Walter, who passed away a week ago, at least now she is with Jesus.

Weddings always bring interesting feelings. I guess mine was patience. Marriage, or even relationships for that matter, aren’t to be rushed. They are instead meant to be enjoyed, every step along the way. This doesn’t always happen, but its good to see people profess that they are choosing to love each other til their earthly bodies diminish. Love is a choice. I have to remind myself of this occasionally.

I have five weddings to go to this summer, and will only make it to three. I’m in two wedding parties, one of them is Matthews. I am very excited for him. He by far is not a perfect person, but he will make a good Godly husband and father.  He better pop out some kids so I can be an uncle. Doesn’t “Uncle Barry” have a nice ring to it?

Galveston was interesting. Ike was the third most costly storm in US history. Sadly people didn’t even notice because it was during election season. Sad how much things like politics can overshadow such important things like people who are without houses, family members, meals, clothes, you name it. Most of the damage was inside houses with flooding, which made the appearance of the town attractive compared to its internal devestation. I hope to go back again.

My Great-Grandmother. I probably have the most to say about her, so if you’ve become bored by this point, don’t bother finishing. She was something else. I was lucky enough to talk to her a few days before her passing. I wish I had gotten to know her better than I did. I always feel bad, because old people have all this life-long wisdom right, but what if there is no one to ask questions? I am afraid this will happen to me. Back to Betty though.  I had two great opportunites during her service. One was to be a pallbearer, which isn’t as intense as I thought it would be. The other was my family asked me if I could share a scripture. I am continually reminded of how I am the only male spiritual leader in my immediate family. I of course did, didn’t know what I was going to read until 5 minutes before the service (As usual, try to plan ahead and it doesn’t happen). God led my thought to the part in Romans about hope, which I thought was in 6, but is actually in 8. As God would have it, its part of a section that talks about the future glory. You should read it. So that was good, I also got some sweet items of hers. The one I really wanted was her old 1968 Zondervan KJV Concordance, sweetness. I also picked up a mug that is from a Hot Dog Sandwhich Shop in Butler, PA, apparently my Great-Grandfathers favorite restaurant. I also got a necklace from her that have nitroglycerine pills in it,  used for heart conditions of course. Also a CD by the Gaither Vocal Band. Its white-guy gospel music, which isn’t my favorite, but reminds me of her. And last but not least, a manual handbeater. Betty used to be the town-baker back in PA, and this item is an absolute classic. But of course the best support I received from my Great-Grandmother was her undying support of my faith. I’ll for sure miss her.

I start my classes tomorrow. Last semester of college, here I come!

My Purpose on WordPress

This break has been good. God has been revealing a lot to me. One of the things He has shown me is my need to be purposefully and intentional with everything I do, including my time on here. I think it is great that people can get to know me through this, but I’m willing to take it beyond that.

I want to challenge and inform. God has blessed me with some wisdom and knowledge about various subjects. I want this blog to turn into a challenge for people, something they can wrestle with. This might be in the form of a question, verse from the Bible, or a controversal topic. I think that in the future I will start writing topics on information that has been/is challenging to me. Hopefully this will inform some who want to know but don’t have the time to ask, and will provide a place to ask questions.

I’m thinking some of these topics will be evolution/creation, stem cell research, abortion, infant baptism, guy/girl relationships, pornography addiction, homosexuality, pharmaceutical drugs and side effects, etc.

Please feel free to comment if you would like to know or discuss something I might know something about (obviously I don’t know everything).

Hope this is beneficial to many!

Intentionality

God keeps bringing up the word intentionality. I know why, but I don’t like it. Over and over he brings me across this word with the hope that I’ll cling. I see it in my relationship, in my friendships, school work, spiritual life, everywhere. That in order to serve Him and serve others best, I need to be intentional. It is part of being a man that I’m dragging my feet through.

With my girlfriend, Wesley, the result is easily found; she doesn’t feel pursued. If she doesn’t feel pursued, then she doesn’t feel her worth. And if she doesn’t feel her worth, than what business do I have being in a relationship with her? This is definitely a challenging part of relationships that I have never faced and never expected to face. But from talking to a few of my close guy friends (some of which are engaged), I came to the realization that it doesn’t end. That a woman needs to be constantly reassured. Reassured that she is beautiful, that she is stunning, that she is worth being with. Women need more of this than men are fit to give. Enter God. If I try and do this without Him, my attempts will suck the life right out of me, because compared to Him, I have nothing to give.

I’ve noticed the trend with some friends. Since school has gotten more rough and more time-consuming, I’d had to cut back a few hours with friends. Some didn’t notice, some didn’t make a big deal of it, and some did make a big deal of it. It has really left me in a quandary as to how to sustain friendships. Again, its intentionality. It is when I have the time, calling people asking to grab coffee or hang out. I used to be great at that, and now I stink at it. Forgive me.

Most of all, as with all situations, the fruit of my lack of intentionality is rooted at my relationship with God. I can’t really think of why, but lately I’ve definitely been falling into the trap of NEED. That inside my head, I make a checklist; I NEED to pray, I NEED to read the Word, I NEED to evangelise, I NEED to worship. But God doesn’t want that checklist. Don’t get me wrong, these things are important and there are times when you just need to do them, but when the feeling consistently becomes a matter of “have to” over “want to”, then the heart of seeking Gods presence through these things is corrupt. He wants me to want Him. He wants me to be intentional and diligent with my time spent with Him. It’s something that I’m definitely still learning.

Forgot what that was like

So this morning, if you live in Fort Collins, was pretty cold. 27 degrees to be exact at 8am. And for my Triathlon Training class, we went on a jog. It was rather nice actually, and I’m sure I got a lot of weird looks from people on the roads. Anywho, so after my run I showered, and as I was changing, I had an experience that I haven’t had in a really long time. The hiccups. I totally forgot what it felt like to have hiccups, its so strange. I remember hearing when I was young that you grow when you hiccup. I don’t think its probably really true, but those kind of assciociations stick with you. It was interesting thinking about the misconceptions that come even with hiccups. If you see someone with the hiccups, you could very well be convinced that they are growing. But the fact is that they aren’t. I wonder if that happens spiritually too, I’m actually pretty sure that it does. That we see someone reading their Bible, apparently deep in prayer, dedicating a lot of time to church, so on and so forth. But how can we be the ones to measure someones growth? To be honest, I think I can tell a lot more about someones spiritual growth when they aren’t doing those things listed above. Weird to think about how I view others. Do I compare myself? Do I pray for their growth? Do I ask how God is moving in their life? What challenges they are facing? Or do I just sit back, take notes and force my small brain to try and define someone elses spiritual life. If I do this at all, I’m probably so far from the truth I’d be embarrassed. And I don’t get embarrassed easily.

Also another interesting event this morning was while I was walking to Physical Chemistry I came across a friend of a friend, Whitney. She was going to Biology in Yates, and I was headed to Chem. She asked what class, and I told her P Chem, and she said, with quite interest, “Whats that?” So I explained the best I could, that pretty much its measuring the physical motion and energies of electrons in molecules through formulas, and also analysis of the vibrations and rotations of molecular bonds in spectroscopy to determine unknown molecules or movement of electrons. Suprisingly, she was amazed. It kind of made me realize how cool the stuff I do actually is, and a lot of time I take it forgranted. It’s so easy to just claim to yourself to not be passionate about something that you actually really enjoy just for the sake of being lazy. This semester has been tough for me to be intentional with my school work. It’s been a major challenge to complete my work, for reasons that are unknown to me. As I sit right now, I have about 5% done on a PChem lab writeup that was due a week ago, and 2 assignments for Quantitative Analysis lab do at 5 that I haven’t started. Hopefully God can pull me through and I’ll have a better perspective/attitude next semester.

I leave for Mississippi tomorrow, so I won’t be blogging for a week. But you can count on hearing some awesome relief mission trip stories when I return. Please be praying for me and my team as we travel to serve and love on the people affected my the hurricanes. Thank you.